In the last issue of Mothering magazine, an article explored how work-at-home moms balance their success with personal lives. It got me thinking: how do I balance my children’s needs with the ongoing demands of a small home business?
Obviously, I don’t have a simple answer. But I do know this: I feel guilty all the time!
My best friend, who stays home full-time with her son, is always available to play with her whenever he demands that attention. When we’re on the phone, she’d cut me off and tend to her son on a whim. I don’t do that. Rather, sometimes I can’t do that. But more honestly, I choose not to do that when other tasks call for my attention. If it’s a customer service email, I tell my children to “wait until mommy is done working.” Oftentimes, it’s just site maintenance and paying bills. It’s awfully unfair. Why? These tasks do not have an immediate deadline. Like dirty dishes or laundry, they can be done later. Luckily, my children are old enough to be lost in their own imaginary world for hours. For instance, they are Juni and Carmen, going on a mission in the tropical isle of monsters. I can hear their gibber and jabber. And I’m free of guilt to work.
At the end of the day, I still feel guilty for leaving them to play on their own. I’m not that mother you’d see at the park enguled in imaginary play with their children, giggling blissfully under the sun as her rug rats tackle her to the ground. I’m the mom with my cup of coffee on the bench, texting while watching my kids go up and down the slide in yet another imaginary scenario. I wonder, how much of their imagination engenders out of necessity? I shudder at the thought of me being the culprit.
But they are happy, well-adjusted children. How did that happen? An accident, I’m sure. I’m naturally upbeat and optimstic, therefore, they have must have inherited that good gene from me. If I can spare more precious moments to watch them grown like sprouts…wait, I can! It’s my choice to take that time…so here I go. Off to the world of Spy Kids. Maybe I should google the premise of that movie first……
